My name is Anne White. If you found this diary, it probably means I am dead. I ask you, with all my heart: please, return it to my loved ones. Seek the Golden Arena circus. Seek the White family, the acrobats and tight-rope walkers. Deliver them this journal, and tell them I love them. Tell Marguerite, my sister, that she saved me. She will know what it means.

I have never kept a diary until now. So many things have happened, though, that I feel they should be recorded somewhere. Maybe, in the end, the diaries and journals of all the Children will be the only trace left of us. We are all doomed; even if we survive this city, our lives will be forever affected by the Sandstorm. Its death toll weighted on the world – our death toll weights on us.

I will not speak about the past here; it is dead and gone. Maybe one day, when I can revive it without all the suffering it brings. For now, it is still too recent for me; the pain is still too vivid. We have been through the fires of hell, and I am not sure yet if we will ever overcome them. Some wounds never heal, no matter how hard you try.

Therefore, from my past in New Pork, as we call the city, I will only say I followed the Wharf Rats for a time. Then, I joined the Vampires; I am now part of the Cigarettes. To be frank, at times it gets hard to tell the difference between them, between us.

And then, Axel… I'm afraid. I'm terrified, for I think he is right, even if I do not care to admit it to myself. I do not want to, I will not! He has no right to meddle with my feelings. Not Seraphim. I have every reason to fear him, to hate him, to despise him, and still… Why? Why did Axel have to bring that up? I hate Seraphim. I would throttle him with my bare hands, if I could. And Rattlesnake as well, but Seraphim… He is a traitor. It was his fault, he is the one to blame. If not for him, I would still be in the Cigarettes' cells, true, but at least I would be myself. What he has done I do not forgive. I am tired of following the paths my heart chooses; they bring nothing but pain and lies. It will bring suffering again.

And anyway, it is useless – he still loves Serenity.